Hineygirl

Emigration...

2006-09-06T12:11:00.000+01:00

I've recently created a personal 'MySpace' and because it has a blog facility I will be using that from now on. The address is: http://www.myspace.com/hineygirl

At some point in the next month I will be deleting this blog...so, thanks for reading and I hope you will visit me on my new space :)

Happy Birthday To Me!!

2006-08-19T11:18:00.000+01:00

Hurrah! It's my birthday tomorrow and I am very excited - I have no fear about being a year older unlike some people. This year I'll be 32, but I certainly don't feel it. I do agree with people when they say that age is a state of mind. My Grandpa was in his 80's but his spirit was continually that of a young man. He knew what it was to see the beauty in life and people despite his and my Grandma's failing health. That is an attitude I want to carry with me as I get older. I also believe that having a relationship with God increases your longevity and keeps you young at heart. I have no father figure in my life now that my Grandpa and Dad have both died - but I like to think that if God, my heavenly father, were to give me a cake, this would be the one He would choose! My name means 'Princess' and I treasure that fact because I know that is how God sees me :) Tomorrow is going to be a good day - I will be a year older and a year wiser. I will get to open lots of lovely presents and spend time with wonderful people - both family and friends. What more could a girl ask for?

Eye candy...

2006-08-17T14:27:00.000+01:00

Calum Best.........

I promised two lovely friends that I would provide them with a lovely bit of tottie to look at when they checked out my blog. As they are big fans of this chappie, I thought it would be ideal to post a piccie of him.

This one's for you ladies - ENJOY!!

Sneezes, coughs and sniffles

2006-08-12T10:54:00.000+01:00

Isn't it just typical? I'm feeling the best I have in months and I get an ear infection, followed closely by a cold. It's just NOT funny. I hate being ill. It makes me grumpy and irritable, and stops me from doing stuff. Fortunately, I got some ear drops which cleared up the infection quickly but the cold is taking longer to go. At least the cough is gone, but I still have a bit of a blocked nose. Mind you, a friend did say to me that I sounded sexy when I spoke 'coz my voice had gone all husky!!! I guess there is at least one advantage to having a cold :)
So, because I am feeling better, it looks like I will be going on my sister's hen night tonight. We are going out for drinks, then on to a comedy club - it should be alot of fun. I think I will still be careful about how much I drink though because of the medication I've had to take this week. Besides, there needs to be a relatively 'with-it' person to make sure that we don't leave anyone behind tonight when we catch the minibus home!
BTW - it's 8 days till my birthday.....

A feverish month..

2006-08-05T09:28:00.000+01:00

August is turning out to be a month of feverish activity. Not only are we on an official countdown to Esther's wedding (21 days!), but it is my birthday, two hen nights (one for Esther and one for a work colleague), a birthday party for friends and other little bits and bobs. Work is pretty manic too as I have the auditors coming in next week - arrg! I'm kinda looking forward to September when things will chill out again. Saying that, I am a person that thrives on activity and having stuff to do, but I also love having the solitude of my own company and relaxing with a good book. It's in the relaxed time that you get to recharge your batteries. This morning I am off to the hairdressers with one of the bridesmaids to have her hair trial for the wedding - I shall just sit and read my book and make the appropriate noises of approval or disgust depending on the hairdo! I'll also have some time to think about my birthday and how I feel about turning 32. It's been a really tough 10 months and I want to make sure that I get some good celebration time for myself, and that it doesn't get swallowed up in all the wedding prep.

TV addict

2006-08-01T08:43:00.000+01:00

It's official - I am a 'Love Island' addict!! I watched the show pretty religiously last year, and was very excited about this new series. To my joy it hasn't disappointed. What has made me laugh is the fact that they have removed 'celebrity' from the title as the folks on there are probably classed as 'Z' list!! There are some crazy folks in there this year - Sophie Anderton being one of them. That girl seriously has a few loose screws - she is so unstable. She is pretty paranoid and I have never heard someone bitch about people so much in my life. Not only that, she has deluded herself into thinking that Shane Lynch loves her dearly (yeah right!) and then says that he has 'big issues' to sort out because he isn't chasing her into bed! I personally have a little bit of a soft spot for Mr Lynch (although I really dislike all his tattoos!) and hope that he wins. The fact that he is a Christian - and that his behaviour reflects that - has impressed me. He treats people with respect and I was most encouraged to see that he was quite firm about the sleeping arrangements situation.
Mind you - it is a bit puzzling that he went on the show when the whole thing is designed to get people into relationships and revive flagging careers! It can't be easy for him though when there are scantily clad women everywhere he turns!! I think my favourite bit so far was when Shane was in the Love Shack with Emily. They had a day trip out and met a psychic/clairvoyant. Not only did he state that her info came from the wrong source, but he stated his belief in God and relationship with Jesus most strongly. He then prayed for Emily that she wouldn't be unduly affected by the rubbish she was hearing and then continued to pray at a slight distance away from where she was talking to the psychic lady. Go Shane - you rock!! Lots of people may think he is a bit nutso, and not understand where he is coming from. However, all the Christians out there will understand and I hope they are cheering the boy on!!

A change is as good as a rest..

2006-07-31T15:39:00.000+01:00

Today has been a dull day at work - despite having work to do. So, I thought I would take a few minutes break and change my blog template.
As you can see - its still pink, but it has a slightly different layout. One of these days I am going to get someone to show me how to create a blog page that is individual and unique to me....

Princess for the day

2006-07-24T11:08:00.000+01:00

Yesterday I had the lovely treat of going shopping with two very good friends to the Bullring in Birmingham. The aim of the day was to buy an outfit for my sister's wedding. I already had an awesome pair of shoes that I fell in love with as soon as I saw them, but the trick was now to find an outfit to go with them!!
Well - the plan was for Rachel and I to go and pick up Victorina - Queen of the Nectarinas, then travel to the train station and get the train to the Bullring. Hmmm - not all went to plan. We couldn't find the train station to start with and drove around and around! When we did find it, we were then told that there was no train to the Bullring due to line repairs but we could get a bus link! Basically, we just got back in the car and drove into Birmingham :)
I am not the best shopper (unusual for a girl I know!!) and I find that changing room mirrors are not generally the most flattering in the world. I also hate trawling round loads of shops just trying tons of stuff on to find the 'perfect outfit'. So...I took the best course of action open to me - I PRAYED! I just asked God that I would find the right outfit and bag, find them quickly and that they would be within my budget.
Well - the first shop we went into was Monsoon (which I love) and they had an amazing sale on. Rachel and Victoria went into a crayzee (that's just for you girls!) searching frenzy and pulled out a ton of stuff for me to try on. We trundled into the 'themed' dressing room and I went into a cubicle called New York (very apt for me). I tried on a lovely cream linen suit with two different jackets, a couple of tops and numerous dresses. The dress above was the first one on, and the one I eventually bought (after thinking about it over lunch). Although, not a sale item it was still worth the money I paid for it. Lunch was next and Victoria had a TON of dressing with her caesar salad and in disgust ended up buying some chips!
We then went to Debenhams after Rachel had prayed and believed we would find the perfect bag there. Sure enough, God came up trumps again. We went into the shoe department and found a little evening bag which matched my shoes perfectly - HURRAH! Victoria even bagged some great suede cowboy boots for herself, and I got 20% off a Matthew Williamson bag I have been longing after for a few weeks :) We also had a rootle round the lingerie dept - but I'm not gonna go into detail about that on my blog!!
The Christian Dior make-up counter was next - and we ended up leaving as the lady was on a break and no-one else could really help us. Mind you - the Ben & Jerry's ice cream I had more than made up for it! Back to the Dior counter for Rachel and Victoria to buy some stuff and then we came home.
It was a great day. Not only did I get to spend some quality time with two very special ladies, but I accomplished in the mission I had set out to do, and didn't end up too broke after it! God was very good to me and I am grateful to Him for all the divine assistance. I am also especially thankful to Rachel and Victoria who made me try stuff on that I wouldn't normally, encouraged me no end, and made me feel good about myself. Thanks girls - you are amazing and I love you very much xx

Heck yes...it's a weird film

2006-07-21T13:18:00.000+01:00

Okay... I may really upset lots of people with this blog but it just can't be helped. After many months of people telling me to watch the film "Napoleon Dynamite" I finally borrowed the dvd off a friend. I sat down in my favourite chair and prepared myself for some hearty guffawing, as I had been informed on numerous occasions that it was very funny. Well.......sorry, I thought it was crap! In fact, there were several times where I nearly switched it off (this is a big deal for me as I ALWAYS watch a film to the end). About the only part that I really enjoyed was the infamous dance scene at the end of the film - that did make me chuckle :) It kind of reminded me of lads showing off at the school disco, or even drunk people at weddings. So, for all those Napoleon fans out there ..I'm sorry....I just can't catch the Dynamite-fever that you all seem to have!!!

Concussed

2006-07-17T12:02:00.000+01:00

I have been suffering from a rather large headache for the past few days. On Thursday I was bringing in some shoppping from my Mum's car into my block of flats. I tend to put all the bags at the bottom of the stairs and then take them up to my flat in a couple of trips. At the bottom of the stairs there is a bit of wall that juts out. When I stood up after putting the bags down I cracked my head off this part of wall - BIG OUCH!
I remained still for a few moments whilst running down a mental checklist - am I feeling dizzy, am I going to faint, is my nose bleeding? etc. Whilst the answer to these questions were no, I did discover that I had broken my glasses I use for reading/driving/computer work, cut my nose and grazed my forehead AND a lump was starting to grow!
So - although I am physically fine, apart from the headache, I am praying for money to replace my glasses and thanking God that I didn't give myself a black eye! Wouldn't that have looked attractive?

Oscar the hound

2006-07-11T11:49:00.000+01:00

I'm not smiling today. My cousin Zoe wasn't able to come visit after all. She had to take her dog Oscar to the vet yesterday, who told her that poor old Oscar had a cancerous tumour and may need to be put down. So, he is off to the vet's today to have an x-ray and possible exploratory operation. I really hope that he will be okay - that they find the problem and can get rid of it. I remember how devastated I was when our greyhound got poorly and Mum had to take her to the vet to be put down because she was in too much pain. Animals really do become a big part of the family when you have had them for any length of time, and it can be really hard when they finally move on to doggie heaven. Hopefully Oscar has a good few more years left in him. Be well little buddy!

Zozo

2006-07-10T11:03:00.000+01:00

Hooray ... my cousin Zoe is coming to stay with me this week. My Mum is travelling from Wales to bring down the bridesmaid dresses for the fitting, and is picking Zoe up on the way. Zoe hasn't been down to visit in a few years, so I'm sure we'll have lots of fun. It will also give her a chance to catch up with her crazy cousins in England and chill out :) I love holiday time!

Tipping....

2006-06-21T13:47:00.000+01:00

My poor cousin....this is what has happened to the car he was looking after for his friend who was on holiday!! Mini-tipping, that's a new one on me.
The funny thing is, only a little while ago I was replying to one of those email questionnaires 'find out more about your friends'. One of the questions was "have you ever been toilet papering"? I answered that yes, I had. I then also mentioned that I had witnessed cow-tipping also (let me just clarify right now that I did not participate!!).
Cow tipping is apparently a time-honoured tradition of drunken fraternity blokes. They wait fo a cow to fall asleep, creep up to it, push hard and watch it tip over - horrendous, I know. This is also done to sheep, although I have never seen it.
Anyway, I thought it would be something random to blog about :)

Lovely tan!

2006-06-20T09:20:00.000+01:00

Okay - I admit it. The advertisers have suckered me into buying Johnson's Holiday Sun!
I have very fair skin, and I only have to be out in the sun for a short time and I turn that rather attractive shade of lobster red. After watching several friends use it rather successfully, and the fact that my sister's wedding is looming large on the horizon, I decided to buy a bottle and give it a whirl. Hmm - it went on really well, and made my skin feel very soft. BUT.....it stinks!! When I first put it on I didn't notice the smell, but after about 30 mins I was aware of a slightly odd fragrance. It took me a few moments to realise that it was coming from my skin and that it was the lotion. All I can say is that Johnson's definitely need to work on that, otherwise they could find sales dropping off quickly. I've also had words with my friends for not warning me about the smell!!!

Butt Prints In The Sand

2006-06-14T16:24:00.000+01:00

One night I had a wondrous dream,
One set of footprints there was seen,
The footprints of my precious Lord,
But mine were not along the shore.
But then some stranger prints appeared,
And I asked the Lord, “What have we here?”
Those prints are round and large and neat,
“But Lord, they are too big for feet.”
“My child,” he said in sombre tones,
“For miles I carried you alone.
I challenged you to walk in faith,
But you refused and made me wait.”
“You disobeyed, you would not grow,
The walk of faith, you would not know,
So I got tired, I got fed up,
And there I dropped you on your butt.”
“Because in life there comes a time,
When one must fight, and one must climb,
When one must rise and take a stand,
Or leave their butt prints in the sand.”

God never gives up on us, but He will let us learn some hard lessons!

Strawberry laces

2006-05-23T12:48:00.000+01:00

I rediscovered my love for strawberry laces today - yum yum! As I was sharing them round the office discussion developed about the sweets we all used to love when we were children - mojos, sherbet fountains, cola cubes, star bars! I know that some of these are still avilable today but you wouldn't necessarily buy them.
I always remember crisps having alot more in them and being a heck of alot cheaper (remember Space Invaders for 10p?). Ahh... nostalgia.......

Race For Life...

2006-05-22T13:25:00.000+01:00

This is my gorgeous sister Becky and she is doing the Race For Life on Sunday 14th June.
She really needs some sponsors so I decided to take it upon myself to advertise on my blog!
If you would be generous enough to sponsor her then please use the following link - www.raceforlifesponsorme.org/beckyboop

Thanking you in advance for your kindness....

Meet Benjamin Patrick Carlson

2006-03-16T09:51:00.000Z

Well - I had the best news when I got into work this morning! I logged into my email and got this lovely surprise....

My best friend Erin (who lives in the USA) had her baby boy in the early hours of yesterday morning. Benjamin Patrick Carlson was 8lbs 6oz and a whole 21 inches long. Mum and baby are doing well and Dad is chuffed to bits!!

Unfortunately, I am unable to be out there to enjoy all the excitement and celebrations of the new birth 'coz I live three thousand miles away in the UK! (big sigh....sad violin music.....are you feeling sorry for me yet?!!!)

Anyhoo...it's such good news and I am over the moon for Erin & Chris. I know that they are going to be amazing, loving and fun parents. I'm sure that little Ben is going to be a daily source of joy for them (even though they are likely to have some sleepless nights!), and I really hope that he isn't "too growed-up" before I get to meet him!!

Under pressure

2006-03-08T12:58:00.000Z

I'm in the middle of annual billing in work at the moment, and as usual there have been enough complications to push my buttons and test my patience!!

First thing - printer wouldn't work to print the Business Rates bills
Second thing - some of the alignment of the text on the bills was squiffy
Third thing - pulling the bills that are due to receive some sort of relief as the system wouldn't let me process the applications prior to the new charge being raised!

Then you have people getting arsey on the phone with you because you aren't able to look at their account because the system is down. I've quickly developed a nauseatingly polite and conciliatory tone to use with these people. In fact, I could get an Oscar for it!!!

Patience is apparently being "consistently and constantly the same."
Hmmm....I definitely need to improve on that.

One flaw in women

2006-03-07T14:18:00.000Z

By the time the Lord made woman, He was into his sixth day of working overtime.
An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart -and she will do everything with only two hands."

The angel was astounded at the requirements. "Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."
But I won't," the Lord protested. "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."

The angel moved closer and touched the woman. "But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.
The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."

The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one." "That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, "that's a tear!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."
The angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."

And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colours. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning. They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends. Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN, IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

Encounters of the God kind

2006-02-28T12:36:00.000Z

I have some amazing friends - two of them being a a couple from my church who are also the Youth pastors. They are two of the most faithful and steadfast people, they bless me on a VERY regular basis and they are brave enough to have a large family (5 boys to be exact!!!).

This past weekend was a marker for them as they led the youth of our church in their first encounter weekend. They were sooo excited, and I was so pleased for them. They have prayed and fasted and dug in over the years and now are seeing the fruit of their labour with more young people giving their lives to God.

Not only that, but they are raising five delicious boys who are well on their way to becoming awesome men for God. On Sunday, I had a great time walking all five of them back from church to their house. The twins (9 yrs old) decided they were going to pick some interesting stones from the ground and give them to their Mum. I set them the challenge of using those same stones to ask God for a prophetic word to give their Mum.

Blow me if they didn't get some pretty great words too!! This was as much of a challenge to me as it was to them. They had the amazing faith to ask, and receive, and give those prophetic words. I learned that it is as simple as that!
I do have a tendency to complicate things, and sometimes struggle with the fact simple things are in fact....SIMPLE THINGS!

Laid to rest

2006-02-22T14:35:00.000Z

My Dad has died.

He passed away in his sleep as a result of a chest infection. It was totally unexpected and a bit of a shock to say the least. What makes the situation so sad is that he lived on his own and had isolated himself from family and friends over the past 6 years since he separated from my Mum.

I had to go to his flat and clear it out, and it was probably one of the most distressing things I have had to do. The place was in a real mess and it was also very damp. Clearing out all the furniture and going through the paperwork etc. gave me insight into how tragic my Dad's life had become.
The funeral was yesterday, and considering the fact the minister did not know Dad, and had to deal with the fact that he was estranged from pretty much the whole of the family, he did a good service. I did a reading from 1 Samuel 16:7 which talks about how God does not look at the outward appearance, but at the heart. I just hope that my Dad is finally at peace and with God. He was an emotionally messed up man, but he did have faith and I pray that he never lost it.

I realised by the end of yesterday that I did the grieving for Dad, and my relationship with him, a long time ago. Yesterday was the door finally closing on a painful past, but I am intent on remembering the good times that I did have with him growing up. Not that I will begin to view Dad through rose-tinted glasses, but that I will temper negative memories with good ones.

May you finally know peace Dad...

Prayers please...

2006-02-10T13:35:00.000Z

My brother-in-law to be is back in hospital.
Apparently he started to bleed so they had to rush him back in.
Prayers greatly needed for speedy recovery - thanks :)

It's a long time since I smelled something beautiful...

2006-02-06T10:08:00.000Z

I watched 'Chronicles of Riddick' last night with some friends - I think it is much better than 'Pitch Black' even though I liked that too! Seeing Judi Dench in a sci-fi/fantasy film was interesting. However she is such an incredible actress that she adapts to pretty much any role she plays.

Vin Diesel is rather yummy (it's always nice to have some eye candy!) and I really love his deep voice, so I tend to enjoy most things I've seen him in. Unfortunately, he does tend to have some really cheesy one-liners like "...the things I gotta do for my country..." in 'XXX'.

The theme of the film is quite interesting - fight or convert to the Necromonger way. Obviously Mr Riddick fought - but when presented with such a choice what would you do? Would it be easier to convert to another faith than suffer the pain of death. Or - would death be a welcome release from having to live a life totally contradictory to what you have chosen to live?

Music of the moment

2006-02-04T10:21:00.000Z

I am listening to this awesome album at the moment. It is by a guy called Luke Finch who is the worship leader at MetroChurch International in Sunderland. Although the production isn't top quality, it does not detract from the worship in the slightest.

If you get the chance to listen to it - the most incredible songs are 'Reveal Your Cross To Me' and 'In The Secret Place'. If you want the spiritual warfare stuff then listen to 'Battle Cry', 'Fall, and 'Run'.

I just love it - and I can't wait till we do some of the songs at church! My pastor, the worship leader, and youth pastor all have copies so I'm sure its just a matter of time. I look forward to hearing Mr Finch's next offering...

Made of stern stuff...

2006-02-03T13:42:00.000Z

My brother-in-law (to be in August!) had a major operation the other day.
About two years ago he was rushed into hospital with a ruptured and ulcerated colon due to undiagnosed Crohns disease. He could have died - but thanks to the prayers of many, the fantastic care of the hospital staff, his Mum and my sister, he pulled through.

This meant that both he and my sister had to make some adjustments in their life together as well as deal with all the emotional stuff that came with such an experience.
I just want to blog and say how well they have done. It has been a hard road for them, but because they were both prepared to work at it, their relationship has grown stronger. Their commitment to one another in such a painful journey has been inspirational to watch.

The operation he went through the other day was as a result of his decision to have the final part of his colon removed, a hernia sorted, and his bag moved from one side of his body to the other. He was in theatre for 7 hours. Once again, he has come through it all and is stable and recovering.

Such alot to go through when you are due to get married in 6 months. I reckon they deserve to have an easier ride from now on!

Celebrate good times..c'mon!

2006-01-25T11:37:00.000Z

Today is a good day.....

I PASSED MY EXAMS!!!! This means I am a fully qualified IRRV Technician and now have more letters after my name! What a hoot - I don't even use the ones that I gained from Uni!
It's such a relief to know that I don't have to do any more studying, and that my time is my own :)

I'm off to Subway at lunchtime with a bunch of work colleagues to have a little celebration - it will be a good time. Of course...I will definitely be celebrating at the weekend too.....

Where's the peace?

2006-01-23T12:47:00.000Z

Grrrrrrrrrrrr......I hate noisy neighbours.

I have this guy who lives in the flat next door to me who, at a weekend, plays his music loud and sings along with it. Okay - he isn't completely tuneless, but I really don't want to listen to Elton John, Lionel Ritchie, Kate Bush and some folk music (I think it was Foster & Allen) at top volume.

On Saturday night he started at about 9.30pm and didn't stop till about 2am on Sunday morning. He then picked it up again at about 8am. So, as you can imagine I didn't get much sleep! I was really irritable so I didn't bother going to church because I was too tired and didn't want to inflict my grumpy mood on anyone.

Then, last night, it happened all over again! I couldn't believe it!! My friend Lottie texted me so see if I was ok because I hadn't been at church. I told her the whole sorry story and said that I wished I could surgically remove the guy's voicebox. She thought the whole thing was really funny - yeah, she wants to try it out sometime!!

So, do I put this guy forward for the next series of the X-Factor? Or do I write one polite note asking him to tone it down a bit? I know his other neighbours get hacked off because I can hear them banging on the walls, but he continues to do it!!

Any suggestions would be gratefully received......

May the force be with you

2006-01-17T12:30:00.000Z

This is what Star Wars character I apparently am. I wish my outfits and make-up were as fantabulous as hers!
Check this quiz out - its much fun!!
www.liquidgeneration.com/content/a55hat.aspx?cid=1415

The Love Walk

2006-01-16T09:03:00.000Z

Ok - this weekend has been nuts. Not only have I done overtime at work, but I have managed to grab some good bargains in the sales that I can use for presents over the coming months. The weather has been gross though - its never fun shopping in bad weather. It just makes me grumpy. I did get to chill out on Sunday a bit though - in the afternoon I helped out with some youth stuff and then later on watched 'Dukes of Hazzard' with some friends.

Church was pretty intense. Pastor D is doing a series on LOVE at the moment and it has made me really take stock of myself and my relationships. Spiritual pressure has been building up on me the last few months and it came to a head yesterday. I knew that I had hit a brick wall and that something in me had to give before I could move forward again. So, I went forward for prayer and God came (as He does when you let Him!). With alot of tears and sharing I realised that there are some foundational spiritual principles that I still struggle with e.g. believing I am free.

How can you be a Christian as long as I have been, know these things to be true, and still deep down struggle to believe them for yourself? I remember that it took me quite some time to accept God as Father, purely because my earthly role model wasn't very good. It was easy to have a relationship with God as my provider, but somehow I couldn't get my head around the fact He was my Father,and I was His child. It scared me that I could have that kind of relationship with God because it meant having a closeness with Him that I had never experienced with my own Dad.

So, once again I am on a journey of personal discovery, realising that I am free to make choices - whether they be good or bad ones (preferably good ones!). I need to develop in love - coz if I can't get that right then everything else will fall down around my ears....

To blog or not to blog....

2006-01-10T14:01:00.000Z

I'll be honest - it's been a hard decision in deciding to re-enter the blogging world..

My wonderful Grandpa died a few days after my last posting and I really haven't wanted to blog since then. I didn't have the words to express how much he meant to me and the impact he had on my life - both as a child and an adult. Grief is a wierd thing - it hits you in waves and I have realised that people will process it differently.

I am not someone who has trouble with words, or expressing myself - yet when I need to explain how I have been feeling these last few months, to process the deep emotional stuff, I find I can't do it.

Christmas was hard - although to watch me you probably would not have guessed. I went up to Wales to spend it with my family, and made such a concious effort to be bright, bubbly and funny when actually I felt so sad inside that I just wanted to hide away from the world.
I guess I just need to hand my bag of emotions over to God and let Him help me sift through and make sense of them all. Easier said than done though.....

As for the New Year - well, I have no idea. I don't feel particularly focused or motivated. Work is so unbelievably busy and I am having trouble sleeping. At least I have my sister's wedding to look forward to. Although, if I'm honest, somewhere deep down inside I never imagined that one of my younger sisters would marry before me.

Hmm...blogging today has helped the teeny-tiniest bit. Maybe I won't delete this blog just yet....

The best of British?????

2005-09-26T11:43:00.000+01:00

Be very proud to be British because:

Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.
Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.

NOT TO MENTION...

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.
31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.
British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.
101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.
18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
8 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars.
And finally.........
In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.

**RULE BRITANNIA!!**

Just call me Delia.....

2005-09-23T09:21:00.000+01:00

This is my all time favourite meal - Chicken Zorba. It doesn't take long to make and it is yummy! I thought I would share it with everyone!!

INGREDIANTS (For 4 people)
Juice of 2 limes
1 level teaspoon of ground coriander
1 level teaspoon of ground cumin
Half level teaspoon of turmeric
Pinch of salt
1 tablespoon of freshly chopped mint
4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
150g greek style natural yoghurt
170g of hummous
2 tablespoons of olive oil
4 pitta breads
Salad stuff - lettuce, cucumber, tomatoes, peppers

Preparation time - 15 mins
Marinating time - 30 mins
Cooking time - 10 mins

INSTRUCTIONS
1. In a bowl blend together the lime juice, coriander, cumin, turmeric, salt and mint
2. Cut chicken into strips
3. Add chicken to mix, stir well, cover and let marinate in the fridge for 30 mins. Stir occasionally.
4. Mix yoghurt and hummous, cover and chill.
5. Heat oil and cook chicken
6. Toast pitta breads
7. Cut pitta in half crossways. Open and spread with yoghurt and hummous mixture.
8. Fill with chicken and salad.

What was that?

2005-09-22T16:20:00.000+01:00

I can hear!!!

The last week and a half I have suffered from an ear infection in both ears - it has been so painful. It's not nice waking up at 3.30am crying coz it hurts so much! Fortunately, I have had lots of lovely friends pray for me and the infection seems to have cleared up quite well. My ears are still a little tender but I can live with that!!

It's great to be able to listen to music and tv again - it was hurting my ears too much having it on before. Answering the phone at work has been a nightmare! Saying that, I have kind colleagues who have covered that for me too!!

It's so great feeling so much better :)

Half and half...

2005-09-13T13:46:00.000+01:00

Well, I can't describe why but I have been in a really odd sort of mood for the last week. I am going through a phase of not wanting to be around people, but at the same time not wanting to be on my own. How do you find a happy middle ground in that?
When I am at home, I find myself thinking (way too much) and analyzing useless things going on in my life. When I am around people, I get irritated with randam chit chat and want to get away!!

I am seriously wondering what is going on. I am pretty relaxed most of the time and enjoy being with people, but it's almost like a season change - but I'm not sure what the next lot of emotional/spiritual weather is going to be!! Really don't know how to go forward from here - I know that I don't like feeling this way.

This probably isn't going to make much sense to anyone that reads this, but it's cathartic for me!!

U wot?

2005-09-10T11:55:00.000+01:00

This is clever - a colleague at work sent it to me.

Can you read this?

Cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal ! pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!

I need a hero...

2005-09-07T10:14:00.000+01:00

I watched the news last night and saw the update on the New Orleans flooding - it made me so sad. All the looting and violence and the fact that people just don't have anything, and aid is taking its time getting through. It makes you wonder how many of them still have hope in their hearts after such an event.
However, its usually in times like these that people really show what they are made of, and the 'average joe' will become a hero overnight...

Partieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

2005-08-26T13:37:00.000+01:00

Well - I am now 31 - hurrah!! I celebrated all last weekend with friends and family which was so much fun. I went out and about in Kettering on Saturday and had a big BBQ at my friend's house on Sunday.
I did have some fabulous presents though - one of them being a talking Yoda! You can ask him questions, he will tell you stories from the 6 Star Wars films, AND he dispenses words of wisdom!!! How cool is that?

I got my exam results on Wednesday - I passed 2 and failed 2. I am happy though because this is what I was expecting. I will be resitting the two exams in December, so the sooner that is over and done with the better! After that I don't plan on doing anymore courses for a long time!!!

Just to remind you..

2005-08-17T13:52:00.000+01:00

It's my birthday in 3 days.....and I'm excited!! I love having birthdays, and the older I get the more I enjoy them :) The only trouble is people keep asking me what I want....and I don't know. I have most things that I want, and the the one thing I would really like is a car and that is out of everybody's price range!!!

One good thing is that I have been given a computer which is a real blessing....I think it's getting dropped off to me this weekend. I guess that means I will have to get myself a landline so I can hook up to the internet.

Just a random thing to finish with......who is old enough to remember this????

"Pugh, Pugh, Barley McGrew, Cuthbert, Dibble and Grub..."

Touching base

2005-08-13T11:12:00.000+01:00

Ouch! I must have put off my friends and family from keeping up to date with me 'coz its been so long since I blogged! Work and life is just generally hectic, and there is no time to keep updating!! No excuse, I know!

Good/bad news - I get my exam results on the 24th. Good job I get to celebrate my birthday a few days before :) I'm glad that I can resit in December if I don't do so well!
I'm looking forward to my birthday this year - I'm out with friends for dancing and drinking in Northampton. The following day I am having a BBQ with some of my nearest and dearest - should be a really good time. I don't feel nearly 31 though!!!
Its aaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllll gooood!!!

Breathing easier...

2005-06-10T12:41:00.000+01:00

Well ... the exams are over!! Hooray! Life can go back to normal......whatever that means!

They were alot harder than I was expecting. Two of my papers went extremely well, one was bad and the other was so-so (I have a borderline chance of passing that one). I just have to wait till August for my results.
Many thanks to all the people who covered me in prayer - it made a whole lot of difference to my state of mind and helped me conquer some fear.

It has been an interesting time studying for these exams as I have realised that I still have very high expectations upon myself, and worry about failure. I also realised that I have ideas in my head about what people expect of me that are just untrue and unrealistic.....

Two scriptures that particularly got me through this time were from Phillippians and 1 Timothy:
"...let the peace of God that surpasses all understanding, guard your hearts and mind in Christ Jesus..."
"...for God has not given us a spirit of timidity (fear), but a spirit of power, of love and self-discipline ('sound mind' in some translations)...."

How good are they? :)

A simple request

2005-06-03T12:39:00.000+01:00

For those that know me.....please pray.....

My exams are on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday next week and I do not feel prepared. It has been a very stressful time for me (work is busy and we are short staffed) and I have even been suffering from hair loss.
I have spent alot of time encouraging my two work colleagues that they will do well, and forgotten to encourage myself! I have studied, but not to the extent that I would have wished.

All I can say is that I am glad that I can resit in December if needed.... I think I will.....

Visiting Uncle Sam

2005-06-01T13:44:00.000+01:00

Well - I have had an amazing weeks holiday in the USA. I went out for my best friend's wedding and it was soooo good! I got to meet her fiance a few days before the wedding which was nice - I gave him my seal of approval and apparently was not interrogative like some other of Erin's friends had been!!! Probably something to do with English reticence!!! Yeah right - anyone who knows me well will be laughing at this point!

It was just so fantastic to catch up with old friends (some I hadn't seen in 5 years, others I hadn't seen in about 10 years!), and to meet new people. Connections were made that will, I'm sure, continue on into the future. My friends Josh, Mollye, Pastor Bryan and Jen - it really doesn't matter about distance because you are people that God has brought into my life, and that friendship will continue despite geography!

The weather was wonderful for the wedding and Erin looked beautiful. I did a reading, and like the other times I have read in American weddings, a bunch of people came up to me afterwards to tell me how delightful it was to listen to my accent! Erin bought me a lovely jewellry box as a thank-you present and it looks great on my chest of drawers!

I also got to see the new Star Wars film - Yoda totally rocks! It was great to see how the first three films connect with the original three. I even bought my Mum a purple light sabre 'coz she said she wanted one (long story......!). I did spend alot of money on clothes and cds also, just because things are so much cheaper out there and the exchange rate is particularly good at the moment. It's a good job I am doing overtime at work to pay for it all!

It was hard to come home...I didn't want to have to revise for my exams!!!

Happy days...

2005-04-20T13:51:00.000+01:00

Well - my brain cannot take any more information at this time!!! So may things have happened recently that it has been hard to process it all.

The most exciting news is that I got the promotion at work - hooray!!! It's gonna be hard work though as I have the grand total of 5-6 moonths to learn pretty much everything about Business Rates! This is because the woman I am going to be working with has announced that she is having a baby!! Great news, but it means that when she goes on maternity leave I will be left to handle all the workload. How do I manage to get myself into these situations!!!

Teaching at church went extremely well. I decide to talk about what freedom in Christ meant, and used a clip from 'Lord of the Rings:The Two Towers' which went down very well!! We live in a visual world so I may as well make the use of technology in a church setting!! The first five minutes were a bit unsettling, but then I got into my stride and it just flowed from there!

I went away to Keele University for a residential revision week for my IRRV qualification. We worked hard and played hard! I managed to earn the nickname of 'Pat 1' - purely because we had a quiz night and one of the questions was 'what does Postman Pat's licence plate say?'. I don't think I will ever live it down!!!
Revision is pretty much all I am doing at the moment because my exams are the 6-8th June. However, there are four different subjects - two of which are law - which is an awful lot of information to cram into a brain!! At least I get to have a holiday in the USA before I sit my exams. I will probably need one afterwards too...

A bit of blurb

2005-02-22T13:28:00.000Z

I know, I know...its been a ridiculous amount of time since I last blogged. So many things have been happening and life just gets so busy...

Work is going mad at the moment. It's nearly the end of the tax year and the I.T. dept have been updating the system which has created lots of 'down time' and also a horrendous back log of work. Overtime hours have been put in over the weekend - I just keep thinking about the extra cash it will bring in...

Fortunately my Grandpa is alot better which takes the worry off my shoulders. He has had a scan and will get the results at the beginning of March. The wonderful thing is that the pain has gone and he has been able to come off the painkillers - thank you Father God! Big thanks also need to go to faithful friends and family that have been praying.

My course through work is getting harder...and the workload is getting heavier. I am now in the process of compiling study/revision notes as my exams are the first week in June. Exams always worry me - its such a false environment and isn't a fair reflection of your abilities. However, I know that God will help me.

I also have the opportunity to apply for a promotion too. The job is in the same office where I currently work, but is a salary grade higher. The job is split between the work I do now and another section of our department. In essence I would be trained to be expert in two areas. The great thing is that I already know one of the areas well, and the other area I am currently studying in my course. The other great thing is that I will remain in the same office with the same people. So - I'm gonna go for it and see what happens...

The other thing on my mind is that I have been asked to teach at church on a Sunday morning in March. This is nerve-wracking and exciting all at the same time. I have spoken/taught at a couple of conferences and smaller settings, but have never taught on a Sunday. I know I can do it, but the preparation time that is required is alot. After all, I want it to be right word, the word that God wants me to bring. I already have an idea in mind and it is slowly beginning to grow....

So many things to think about....but there is an exciting event to look forward to in May - my best friends wedding!! I can't wait to get back out to the USA.....:)

Does an apple a day keep the doctor away?

2005-01-17T13:34:00.000Z

I've had a tough ten days.....

The first thing to happen was that I got this horrible flu type virus that has been going around. Unfortunately it is taking ages to shift, and I detest being ill because it means I can't do all the things I want to do.

The second thing is that my Grandpa is quite poorly. He has found a lump and is in alot of pain. The doctor has given him some medication and he is due to see the consultant tomorrow. Hopefully, he will be able to shed some light on the situation. What makes this difficult is that my Grandma has sever Alzheimers and my Grandpa looks after her along with help from my mum and uncle.

Why is it that when you are a child you imagine that your grandparents are going to be around forever? It seems that they never grow older....and then one day you realise that they are old and every moment you spend with them is truly precious. I am privileged because I am the oldest grandchild, and so I have spent more time with my grandparents than the others. I have also only known one set of grandparents as the other died before I was born.
I'm choosing not to think about the worst case scenario, and I am trusting God to heal my Grandpa - after all, I need more time with him!!

Taste the rainbow...

2005-01-07T15:53:00.000Z

I was reading through my tv mag last night and suddenly realised just how many programs on tv have something to do with the supernatural. What is the fascination with it all?
I know that when I was a child I was only too ready to belive in Santa Claus, fairies, elves and so on. I also remember how devastated I felt when I found out they weren't real and that there was no door to Narnia in the back of my wardrobe.

However, there is still a part of me, as an adult, that is drawn to things magical. I wish that I had that childlike innocence and belief still. I still love watching films like 'Willow' and 'Labyrinth' and enjoy watching my friends children delight in the magical.
However, there are far too many films and programs that focus on the darker side of the supernatural - the stuff that is really scary! People dabble in the occult, not realising what they are opening themselves up to. When does curiosity cross the dividing line into obsession?

If you want to see change, do something different

2004-12-31T13:23:00.000Z

It's nearly 2005 and I haven't really had a moment to reflect and prepare myself for the forthcoming year at all. I guess I just want 2005 to be better than 2004!! It has been a fairly good year physically/materially - but emotionally the toughest on record!

One of the things I am determined to do is no longer let the bad events of the past effect my future. I see it almost like shedding a skin - I am no longer the person I was at the beginning of 2004. So much has changed internally, and I want to carry on the momentum of becoming the person I was always intended to be.

I want to influence and make a difference to the lives of the people around me - how I'm to do that will need some working out!! However, having the desire to do so is half the battle :)

Take a moment to figure out what you want from 2005, keep that focus and go for it. You never know where the path will lead you...!!

Christmas wishes

2004-12-23T16:28:00.000Z

Well - Christmas is finally upon us and I have been so busy preparing for it that I haven't blogged!! Maybe one of my New Year resolution's should be to blog more often!!

Today is my last day at work before the holiday and I am off to Wales in the morning...I hope the traffic isn't too crazy.

Wishing all who read this blog a truly wonderful Christmas and a Happy and Peaceful New Year.......it will be really interesting to see what 2005 brings!!!!!

Birthday season

2004-11-19T16:59:00.000Z

I realise that I haven't blogged in a little while...

I was in Wales visiting family last weekend. It was my uncle's 50th birthday and he had a ceiladh (pronounced k-lee) which is a bit like a barn dance. It was great fun, and my feet really hurt the next morning. I think my favourite part was being with family that I hadn't seen for a really long time. My youngest cousins are really grown and I feel like I have had to get to know them all over again!!

I realised that I do miss living a few hundred miles away from my closest family - especially because I don't have a car. It's not like I can pop and see people for the weekend if I want to - I would have to account for extra time travelling by train or coach and not spend so much time with them. I am looking forward to Christmas though - all the family are getting together again so it should be a really wonderful time....

Tonight I am off to a 30th birthday party for my friend Pete. He is a big Michael J Fox fan so his wife has organised a 'Back to the Future' theme party. All the guests have to go in either 1950s or 1980s style clothing. I've decided to wear 1950s style as I really hated the 80s style clothing at the time!!!!

Too much to do, so little time...

2004-11-02T13:36:00.000Z

I'm stressed.....

I have started this professional qualification through work (IRRV Technician) and its turning out to be really hard work. I don't mind hard work but it is 7 years since I graduated from University. That's a long time!!! I just can't seem to get my head into study mode yet and I've been doing the course since September!! I am getting the work done, its just that I am finding it hard to find the time to get into a regular study pattern.
It's hard because I have other responsibilities too like leading a cell group, doing the 4-6yrs childrens work on Sunday mornings, going to the weekly leaders meeting. To top it all off I go to the gym three times a week!! All of these are important to me and I know that God has called me to do them (even the gym - I have to keep my physical body going you know!).
However - I don't want to burn out. I probably need to let some stuff go for a season whilst I get this course out of the way. Or.....learn to manage my time better and be more disciplined.

Hmmm - that sounds suspiciously like I need to have better self-control.......

Potential life quote?

2004-10-29T17:12:00.000+01:00

Effort is like a pair of binoculars - no use unless focused........

Faithful and true

2004-10-18T15:15:00.000+01:00

This will be a short, sad posting....

My Mum rang me last night to tell me that our dog had died :(
Sheilaroon was a retired greyhound (an Irish champion too), and had reached the grand old age of 14. Basically, her spine had crumbled and broken and she couldn't move. Mum took her to the vet who told her the kindest thing she could do was have her put down.
I know that alot of people don't understand getting upset over the death of a pet - but Sheely had been part of the family for a long time. Sure, she may have had seriously bad halitosis, but she was affectionate and loved lots of fuss, chasing cats, and anyone who fed her or took her for walks.

I know that it will be really strange without her - no more following you around, no more chewed post - but I bet she is having the time of her life up in doggie heaven. I guess there will be no more arthritic pain and she will get to run and catch those wretched rabbits!!

So long loyal friend................

Just call me Supergirl...

2004-10-11T13:18:00.000+01:00

I had lunch with my sister Esther on Sunday in the pub where she works. Whilst waiting for my food I picked up a magazine and was idly flicking through it when I came across a small editorial. It wasn't the article itself that interested me but rather something it mentioned...."Invisibility or Flight - which superpower would you choose?"

Immediately the 'sci-fi geek' part of my character came right out to play!! Which one would I choose? Actually it was pretty easy - flight is my first and only choice. When I was a child I used wish that I was able to fly, and I even had these reoccurring, incredibly vivid dreams in which I did fly to all sorts of places.
I envy birds so much! The ability to take off at any time and fly to any place you wanted - how awesome is that? I understand that invisibility would be fun (but you would have to be naked all the time - it would get chilly in winter!!), but I think the temptation to do some dodgy stuff would be pretty strong, purely because you know you could get away with it!!

So, which superpower would you choose? Let me know...it would be great to find out :)

Yeah baby!

2004-10-08T17:12:00.000+01:00

Just a quick thought for the weekend :)

"I scream, you scream, we all scream for ICE CREAM !!"

Wouldn't that be a great slogan for a t-shirt?..............

Time best spent...

2004-10-01T13:32:00.000+01:00

I keep having the wierdest dreams.... the last one I had involved me being chased by giraffe's along a bridge-like construction! It can't be cheese before bedtime as I don't eat that late!

Anyway - I had a good time with the folks who came to visit last weekend. I think they enjoyed the delights of lovely Kettering town, despite most of them being from the London area and no doubt more used to its bright lights!

Karaoke in O'Malley's was hilarious - what is it about people that really can't sing believing so whole-heartedly that they can?
Take the programme 'The X-Factor' - it is embarrassing to watch as people really do set themselves up for a fall. Or is it that they just want to be recognised? Not necessarily for having good/bad talent, but more with just wanting to be noticed?

Some colleagues and myself went on a training course yesterday and towards the end of the day we got a little bored.
I decided to play Room 101 ..... here's our results.....

ROOM 101 - what would you put in there?

1. Yellow cars
2. Country and western music
3. Offle
4. The Chuckle Brothers
5. Millennium Dome
6. All weighing scales
7. Tabloid newspapers
8. Christina Aguilera
9. Reality TV shows (particularly Big Brother)
10. Badly behaved children

1. Squid
2. Deidre from 'Coronation Street'
3. Speedos made for the larger man (yuk!)
4. Mothers who shout at children in public
5. All bone idle people too lazy to get off their arses to find work!
7. TV adverts
8. My hair (on a bad hair day!)
9. Nik (when he annoys me!)
10. The Beckhams (I've had more than enough of them now!)

1. This tutor - boring!
2. Question asking lady (I want to get home in time!!)
3. Creme caramel - it looks like dripping
4. DRIPPING!! (Who has pure fat on toast??)
5. Peanut butter - tastes yukky
6. My little sister - annoying
7. All spiders - scared of them
8. Old drivers - get in the way
9. Screaming children
10. 'Eastenders' - depressing!

It would be interesting to see what a shrink thought of us from these answers!!!

Reunion

2004-09-24T16:53:00.000+01:00

Thank Crunchie it's Friday........

I am looking forward to this weekend as some of the folks I was on holiday with in August are coming up to Kettering for a bit of a reunion. No doubt we will be sharing photos, reminiscing and drinking lotsa lovely wine! We may even get our gladrags on and hit Kettering town centre for a bit of a boogie - easy tiger!!
Here comes the night.................................... :)

Sit up and take notice

2004-09-23T09:07:00.000+01:00

Okay - this is something my cousin is reading and posted on her blog. When I read it something clicked - not quite sure what, so will have to think about it before blogging my findings. I guess its to do with the lack of selfishness and the security of self..................

2004-09-23T08:58:00.000+01:00

'A creative work always has its own life. The painting that comes out of the life of an artist is not repeatable. Others can be influenced by it, but they cannot copy the essence that makes it what it is. The imprint of the creator is not in the subject or the techniques. This is why the true artist can give freely to another artist all he knows. Because he lives close to the center of his own life, he will not be threatened by the success of another. He knows that it does not rob him of anything that is his own. The work of others can only enlarge his horizons and call forth his own gift. He can stand before the work of other artists and receive into his life a newness that will make him different. So while it is true that one creative work cannot detract from another, it does not follow that it may not add to another. It will change the man who looks with beholding eyes.'
Extract from "Journey Inward, Journey Outward" by Elizabeth O'Connor

Little Beard is born

2004-09-22T09:03:00.000+01:00

CONGRATULATIONS to Vic and Andy on the birth of George! He was born on 19th September (2 days early!) and weighed in at 7lb 1oz. My friend Bec is an auntie for the first time - excited Miss Bead? Here's to some happy days and sleepless nights guys!!........................

Ooer missis!

2004-09-14T13:16:00.000+01:00

I'm blogging to offer my sister BIGGGG CONGRATULATIONS on getting a job! She has recently graduated and in desperate need of cash! Well done Boop!!!

Went to see the Ben Stiller film 'Dodgeball' on Friday night and it was hysterically funny! Very un-PC and a bit risque at times, but I indulged in many a belly laugh watching it. I can highly recommend it as entertaining viewing. Just one tip if you do go to see it - wait until ALL the credits have finished as one of the funniest bits happens just as the curtain is about to go down!!!

Random thoughts

2004-09-10T13:19:00.000+01:00

Surprise, surprise - its raining!! I'm stuck in work during my lunchbreak and can't go out because I didn't bring a coat or umbrella to work today. It was boiling hot when I left the house this morning!!

Last night I saw my youngest sister Becky, and she gave me a copy of her graduation photo - which she looks really good in! Better than I looked in mine. It got me thinking when I saw it though - there are 9 years between us and it really hit me that she is not only my baby sister but most definitely an adult. I mean, I know that she is an adult, but I guess it really did sink in last night!! When do people suddenly grow up? It seems to happen overnight!

Saying that, when did I get so retrospective? Is that what turning 30 does to you? I do feel like I am taking stock of my life more seriously than I have ever done before, and in some ways its frightening because you discover the deeper things about yourself - good and bad!

Okay, I'm bored examining myself now. Gonna go eat some lunch..................

Two hearts become one

2004-09-09T17:11:00.000+01:00

My best friend in the whole world is getting married! Yeay!! I am so excited for her because she has wanted this for such a long time, and so deserves to find her Prince Charming. Saying that, I haven't met her prince yet 'coz Erin lives 3,000 miles away in New York!
What I love about our friendship is that it isn't spoilt by the distance. In fact our friendship is probably stronger because of the fact we have had to put effort and time into maintaining it. Of course - it always helps when you naturally 'click' with someone. Erin probably knows me better than anyone else, purely because we tend to pour out our hearts and souls when we write to each other. Believe me, we're talking marathon letters here!!
I met her when I studied in New York for a year and although we have seen each other the grand total of 3 times since then, she is (to use an Anne of Green Gables expression) my "bosom buddy", and her family have totally adopted me - just as mine did with her when she visited the UK.
So - the point of this post? That I truly appreciate the friendships that I have in my life, and I try to not take them for granted. Also, I just wanted Erin to read how much I love her and how glad I am that she is my friend (crying yet?!!).
Seriously, I don't know where I would be without my friends.......

Rah's code

2004-09-07T16:49:00.000+01:00

I believe life is more than survival
I believe the heart is more than a muscle
I believe in hope and freedom
I believe we can know right from wrong
I believe my life can make a difference
I believe the message of the cross
What do you believe?.........

You're never alone...

2004-08-31T12:09:00.000+01:00

I experienced for the first time this weekend what it feels like to be lonely and in the process learned a valuable lesson - again!. It's not an emotion I have ever suffered from but being poorly and unable to get out and about and the fact that I now live by myself, all contributed! I always hate it when I am ill because not only are my bodily defenses AWOL, but my emotional and spiritual ones take a nose-dive aswell. As a result I had a couple of truly POM (poor 'ole me) days.
On Sunday I got myself to church and was totally refreshed by being in God's presence. There were some real teary-eyed moments as I realised that I really can't ever be alone because God just doesn't go away, and the Holy Spirit is always with me. I also learned anew that I am part of a family and that all I really needed to do was pick up the phone and any number of people would have come to visit/care for me.
So, note to self - be quicker to ask for help when needed!

I also had a bit of a 'Tim-nice-but-dim' moment this week. I bought a DVD player with some of my birthday moment not checking whether I had the right connections for it on the tv. Surprise, surprise - when I got home I realised there was no scart socket on the little tv/vhs combi that a friend has loaned me!! Guess I'll be saving up for a new tv....doh!

The power of a virus

2004-08-27T09:24:00.000+01:00

Okay - its official. I feel like poo!!! I have had a horrible cold since coming back from holiday and it won't shift, despite dosing myself with medicines. I have been in work all week, but not felt right about taking any sick leave as there are only three of us in the office. The others are on holiday or on courses.
I know I sound like a moaning minnie, but all I really want to do is to be curled up in bed watching a film.
Aitchoo!.... See? It's even spreading online..................

Hooray!

2004-08-26T17:14:00.000+01:00

I found out that I have passed my ECDL course (European Computer Driving Licence). I'm very happy!!!

Skin deep beauty

2004-08-26T13:42:00.000+01:00

I watched Nip/Tuck for the first time last night - man, scary stuff. People get themselves into such a stress in the desperate quest for the 'body beautiful'. Its so sad to think that many people have such low self-worth and self-esteem that they believe they can make themselves feel momentarily better by having cosmetic surgery.
Don't misunderstand me - I'm not saying I've never had a day where I berate the way I look. There have been a fair few of those!! But what is important is that we don't let it dictate our feelings and behaviour. There are things I like about myself, and things that I don't - but I am who I am and know there are people that love me and accept me. God is beautifying me from the inside out - and that can be just as painful as surgery sometimes, but the result is far more lasting.
As much as the program was distressing, it is also compelling viewing and no doubt I shall tune in to watch it next Wednesday night..........

Icklemissmo

2004-08-25T12:48:00.000+01:00

I blogged my cousin Zoe yesterday as she is feeling a wee bit blue because her older brother - my other cousin Jon - has moved out of home. My heart really went out to her as I know how hard it can be to deal with big changes in your life, particularly when family members that you are close to are moving on. I struggled myself when I stayed in Kettering and my Mum moved back to the land of her birth - Wales. Somehow it seemed really wrong that it was the parent moving away rather than the child.
Any time of transition is difficult, but as I told Zoe, the trick is to adjust your focus to see the possibilities such change brings. I realised that I truly had to stand on my own two feet, that I couldn't continue to hide in my Mum's shadow (not that she ever put me there!), and that God was leading my family in different directions at that time. Mum went to Wales along with my sister Rachel, Becky was at University and Esther (despite living in the same town) was doing her own thing.
The cool thing is that God has brought some us back together for the present. Both Rachel and Becky have graduated recently and have come down to live in Kettering for the time being. I'm not quite sure what God is up to, but believe that this time will have an impact on their spiritual lives as none of them are walking with God at the moment. This breaks my heart as it causes a separation between us. However, I know that God is in the business of restoring families which gives my heart much hope!
Its in times of change and transition that we can learn an awful lot about ourselves and our priorities. The key is how we approach these times - not with dread, but with a mind and heart open to the new things it can bring. Sometimes we have to press through the pain, other times it doesn't hurt, but you can guarantee that you come out of it a more clued-up individual!!!!

Reaching a milestone

2004-08-24T16:31:00.000+01:00

Turning 30 - not quite the shocker that I imagined. I was in Spain on an Oak Hall holiday and had a whale of a time despite spending the night in a hospital with one of the girls who decided to get completely hammered!! I also had my room burgled and the most random things were stolen - a make up brush, a pair of tweezers and 20 English pounds. Bizarre? I think so!
Anyhoo - I have realised that it really doesn't matter what age you are because God still has a plan and purpose for you and as long as you are walking in His will it works out. I have had a very eventful, sometimes traumatic, first 30 years but look forward with anticipation to the next 30. I honestly wouldn't change alot of what has happened because I wouldn't be the person I am today without it. I'm sure my character would not be as half as developed either.
There are so many things to be thankful for when you 'count your blessings'. I have an awesome family - immediate, extended and spiritual, a good job and a lovely flat. God's mercies are new every morning. I have known His provision, love, comfort, discipline and protection.
The day of my birthday I did take stock of the things that I had always imagined I would have achieved by the time I was 30 - very few of them have happened but I don't have any regrets about that. I know that there are some things I will probably never do now, and others that are still waiting to be achieved. I call it my wish list - its good to have vision and focus as it keeps me motivated.
There are many other things I thought about on my birthday - most are jumbled thoughts at this time and I'm sure will eventually be blogged as I unravel them. One thing I am convinced of is this - I am starting a new season in my life, the old has gone and the new is coming. Excited? Yes, I am! I find that I don't generally have dull moments - or at least, not ones that last very long!!!! It will be interesting to see what happens from this point onwards.....

The first time

2004-07-30T14:01:00.000+01:00

Thanks Jon - I have officially entered the world of blogging! I guess its a case of learning as you go.
Here's to the next posting.........................